Seeing Joe live must be exhilarating

I can't imagine the awesome feeling of walking into a venue knowing Joe is about to perform.  Myself, having social phobia I will never know what it's like.  I didn't always have SP.  In my early days I went to many, many, concerts.  At age 37 I was diagnosed with having bipolar disorder.  At the same time is when I developed my social phobia.  I guess that is why I have bought every one of Joe's live DVDs in all their splendor...Blu Ray. 

Congrats. to all of you who have had the privilege of watching him in person.  A DVD simply can't capture the encapsulating ambience surrounding one of Joe's shows.

Thank you Jim.  I can definitely sympathize with you no longer being able to attend his shows.  Ok, I hope I'm not getting too deep here.  Being Bipolar, along with suffering through clinical depression, and a list of other disabilities, one of the scariest and most debilitating symptoms is when I fall into DEEP depression.  No words can truly describe the emotional pain associated with such an episode.  It is severe enough that many people who suffer from bipolar have turned to doing the unthinkable just to stop that overwhelming internal pain.  The sense of loneliness, etc. is simply too much for many people to handle.

When I get into one of those episodes there really isn't anything to do to ease the sense of "needing" to join the long list of others who decided to take the "easy" way out.  If I can explain one thing it is that bipolar disorder is a chemical imbalance in the brain and NOT a psychological disorder.  I worked for many years after being diagnosed, always been overlooked by a therapist and psychiatrist.  My doctors suggested I go on disability for years.  I absolutely refused.  I loved my patients too much to just leave them behind.  No way.  Well, one day I, unfortunately, reached the point where it was all too much.  The next thing I remember is waking up in the hospital.  I was extremely lucky to make it out of that one.  At that point my doctors revoked their support of me being able to continue to work. 

It really did not hit me until I got home.  I walked back and forth then BAMM!  Lucky enough I had called my father to let him know what had happened.  By the time I reached my home my sisters, brother, and parents were there waiting for me.  When it hit me that my career was over I must have cried out loud for hours, until I was so tired of crying that I fell asleep.  What bothered me so much was "who could possibly take care of my patients as well as I did?", "who is going to love my patients as much as me?", etc. etc.  The next few weeks were also horrible.  I would wake up each morning, put both feet on the floor and think about the patients I was going to see that day.  In all of about 1/2 a second the realization of there were no more patients was crushing.  I would hop back into bed and cry myself to sleep.  Ya, 45 years old (at the time) and literally cry myself to sleep. 

Let's get back to Joe.  I can say with all honesty that the ONLY thing that keeps me from taking the same route I had attempted in the past whenever I was hit with one of my deepest depression episodes is watching a dvd of one of Joe's live performances.  I already know to call my father whenever I reach a point to where I am in danger.  He comes over and simply sits there with me in my living room.  After a few minutes he knows to put Joe into my dvd player and slowly but surely I am pulled out of this severe state of depression.  It is no stretch to say Joe has literally saved my life time and time again. 

How do you repay someone for something like that?  How do you tell somebody that they have on several occasions saved the life of someone they have never met?  What words can completely convey the gratitude I have for all Joe has done for me and for many others that his music touches?  A dream come true would be to sit with Joe for five minutes and fill him in on the impact he has had on my life, not to mention the lives of my wife and children.  Heck, where would they be...never mind.  However, hearing something like that could be too overwhelming for many people to handle.  Who knows how Joe would react to hearing such a story.  So, I will continue to troll this forum and enjoy the time with so many other Bonamassa fans. 

I hope I did not bum you out with my story of the impact Joe has had on my life.  I wish the message was not so long but I wanted to put things into perspective for you.  I never feel ashamed to share with people that I am bipolar.  The mere fact I am still here can serve as an inspiration for others suffering from some sort of debilitating disability.  We are strong.  You are strong, my friend.  I hope one day your pain will begin to subside, allowing you to return to the life you enjoyed prior to the beginning of your current physical state.  Thanks for "listening".  I hope I did not scare you off.  I know this is a Joe Bonamassa forum and hopefully no one will accuse me of using this place for anything other than what it is...a place to share wonderful stories about one of our favorite artists.  Many blessings.

Jesus

Thank you Jim.  I can definitely sympathize with you no longer being able to attend his shows.  Ok, I hope I'm not getting too deep here.  Being Bipolar, along with suffering through clinical depression, and a list of other disabilities, one of the scariest and most debilitating symptoms is when I fall into DEEP depression.  No words can truly describe the emotional pain associated with such an episode.  It is severe enough that many people who suffer from bipolar have turned to doing the unthinkable just to stop that overwhelming internal pain.  The sense of loneliness, etc. is simply too much for many people to handle.

When I get into one of those episodes there really isn't anything to do to ease the sense of "needing" to join the long list of others who decided to take the "easy" way out.  If I can explain one thing it is that bipolar disorder is a chemical imbalance in the brain and NOT a psychological disorder.  I worked for many years after being diagnosed, always been overlooked by a therapist and psychiatrist.  My doctors suggested I go on disability for years.  I absolutely refused.  I loved my patients too much to just leave them behind.  No way.  Well, one day I, unfortunately, reached the point where it was all too much.  The next thing I remember is waking up in the hospital.  I was extremely lucky to make it out of that one.  At that point my doctors revoked their support of me being able to continue to work. 

It really did not hit me until I got home.  I walked back and forth then BAMM!  Lucky enough I had called my father to let him know what had happened.  By the time I reached my home my sisters, brother, and parents were there waiting for me.  When it hit me that my career was over I must have cried out loud for hours, until I was so tired of crying that I fell asleep.  What bothered me so much was "who could possibly take care of my patients as well as I did?", "who is going to love my patients as much as me?", etc. etc.  The next few weeks were also horrible.  I would wake up each morning, put both feet on the floor and think about the patients I was going to see that day.  In all of about 1/2 a second the realization of there were no more patients was crushing.  I would hop back into bed and cry myself to sleep.  Ya, 45 years old (at the time) and literally cry myself to sleep. 

Let's get back to Joe.  I can say with all honesty that the ONLY thing that keeps me from taking the same route I had attempted in the past whenever I was hit with one of my deepest depression episodes is watching a dvd of one of Joe's live performances.  I already know to call my father whenever I reach a point to where I am in danger.  He comes over and simply sits there with me in my living room.  After a few minutes he knows to put Joe into my dvd player and slowly but surely I am pulled out of this severe state of depression.  It is no stretch to say Joe has literally saved my life time and time again. 

How do you repay someone for something like that?  How do you tell somebody that they have on several occasions saved the life of someone they have never met?  What words can completely convey the gratitude I have for all Joe has done for me and for many others that his music touches?  A dream come true would be to sit with Joe for five minutes and fill him in on the impact he has had on my life, not to mention the lives of my wife and children.  Heck, where would they be...never mind.  However, hearing something like that could be too overwhelming for many people to handle.  Who knows how Joe would react to hearing such a story.  So, I will continue to troll this forum and enjoy the time with so many other Bonamassa fans. 

I hope I did not bum you out with my story of the impact Joe has had on my life.  I wish the message was not so long but I wanted to put things into perspective for you.  I never feel ashamed to share with people that I am bipolar.  The mere fact I am still here can serve as an inspiration for others suffering from some sort of debilitating disability.  We are strong.  You are strong, my friend.  I hope one day your pain will begin to subside, allowing you to return to the life you enjoyed prior to the beginning of your current physical state.  Thanks for "listening".  I hope I did not scare you off.  I know this is a Joe Bonamassa forum and hopefully no one will accuse me of using this place for anything other than what it is...a place to share wonderful stories about one of our favorite artists.  Many blessings.

Jesus