1 (edited by markgtrplyr 2007-05-08 20:56:06)

Topic: Birthday Gift - Laugh

Hi Joe:

I can't give you a gift and I had no way of getting a birthday card to you, but maybe I can give you a small laugh as a "gift"

I heard this today on the radio on my way to work and when I heard the DJ give the punchline I laughed so hard, I almost rear-ended the driver in front of me. Maybe it's because I've been on the "receiving" end of a similar phone call as the punch line.

So here goes.

Joe's a construction worker and one day he has a terrible accident on the job. On balance, he wasn't too badly hurt, however, his "manhood" was so horribly mangled, it was nothing more than a very tiny stump that, for all intents and purposes, was useless.

A few days later, despite his terrible depression, Joe agrees to  meet with his doctor to discuss his situation. Upon entering the office, the doctor immediately sees how down Joe is.

"Joe, I know you think that you've suffered a terrible, terrible accident and now, you're nothing more than a "stump" of a man. Well, the good news is that medicine has made some miraculous advances in penile reconstruction in recent years. In fact, we can "build" you a new penis that is fully fuctional in every way. In fact, not only will it be fully functional, you can now elect to choose a size."

"A size, Doc - what do you mean"

"Well, Joe, if you want a new small one - the cost would be $3,500. A new medium sized one would be $6,500. And, if you're so inclined, we can "build" you a new jumbo sized one for $16,000."

Joe can't believe what he's hearing and immediately realizes that he needs to talk to his wife so that they can decide what he's going to take - the medium sized one or the jumbo sized one (the small one was NEVER an option..!!).

"Doc, would you mind if I used your office phone to call my wife and discuss it with her. This is a big decision and I'd like to get her input before I make a decision"."

"Of course, Joe. Listen, I'm going to go and get myself a cup of coffee.  Talk it over with your wife and I'll be back in a few minutes and then we can schedule an appointment to do the surgery"

So Joe gets his wife on the phone and he's very excited and immediatly tells his wife the two options that are available to him.

A few minutes later after he's sure that Joe's conversation with his wife has ended, the doctor re-enters his office and is surprised to see that Joe is even more depressed looking that he was when he entered his office.

"Joe, what's the matter, did you talk it over with your wife - did you explain the various surgical options that are available to you and that you'll be fully functional with a new and "improved" manhood after the surgery - in fact, you'll be the same man and lover that you were before the accident."

"Yes, Doctor - I did".

"And what was her response"

"She'd prefer to remodel the kitchen instead".

Ok - that's my joke - anybody else got something for our viewing pleasure..!!

Any problem you can't solve with a good guitar, is either, unsolvable or isn't a problem.

Mark

Re: Birthday Gift - Laugh

Oh Mark, that really WAS hilarious.....only because ANY woman who watches HGTV or the DIYnetwork KNOWS you CANNOT remodel a kitchen for $16,000!  wink

Great musicians have a language & vocabulary that transcends the usual barriers & touches us on a more primitive , basic & yet complex level....

...I'll always have London in my heart, and in my soul...

Re: Birthday Gift - Laugh

Mark,
I'm not sure about Joe, but you sure made me laugh! Thanks.

"Rock ON & Keep the Faith"